Monday, November 3, 2014

What a strong woman is...and what is it not.

There’s a lot of woman rage going on lately. For a variety of reasons. And I have some feels about it all, but don’t want to go on a twitter or heaven forbid, Facebook tirade on the whole thing. So I’m doing what I do when I want to get it all out.

Posting it on my blog, so if people choose to read it, they can. If they choose to comment, they can. And, I know, this is unheard of in today’s age of insta-rage and emo-tweetage, disagree with me and that's okay too.

First, I want to state it publicly here, I am a woman. I know. Groundbreaking. Second, I have a lot of opinions. Another huge surprise. Some, may even call me strong. And on some days, I agree with them. Others, not so much. I cry into my bag of Doritos as much as the next person. I love Doritos, by the way.

But there’s this attitude, which is permeating social media and thus other media, seeping into the consciousness of America. That somehow, being a strong woman means I have to agree with everything other women say. And if, for some strange reason I don’t, I may be labeled as a woman hater, or an anti-feminist, like I’m anti-woman. Like somehow, I am the problem with America.

I call bullshit on that.

A strong woman is not someone who goes around naked on a street corner proclaiming “SEE ME!”

A strong woman is not someone who doesn't need a man or anyone else for that matter.

A strong woman is not someone who has the loudest voice, carries the largest stick, or bullies her way into conversations because she thinks the other person is being objectified or being made to be submissive.

A strong woman is not someone who calls attention to herself and then is mad when people take notice.

A strong woman is not someone whose tongue is barbed and lethal.

Somewhere along the road of woman empowerment, people have gotten the idea that being a strong woman means demeaning others, hurting feelings and offending anyone who disagrees so they can further their own agenda.

So what IS a strong woman?

A strong woman knows when to speak out, and when to hold her tongue.

A strong woman knows that knowledge and opinion is fluid, and whenever you think you understand a situation, that’s when you really don’t.

A strong woman can admit her mistakes, take responsibility and say I’m sorry.

A strong woman knows everyone has a story that is as important as her own. No one is better than anyone else.

A strong woman knows that there are more opinions than stars, and hers is only a flash in the universe of ideas.

A strong woman is one who takes care of others, nurtures, supports, and forgives, even when the other person isn't asking for any of those things.

A strong woman is not one to point fingers at the world. She understands things happen, and she can’t control everything, and trying to would be like Sisyphus and the boulder.

A strong woman knows having others by her side, asking for help, or leaning on others is not a sign of weakness, it’s a sign of her strength.


And I will not apologize for being a strong woman.  Ever. And another strong woman would never ask me to.